OOTD 001 | DATE NIGHT LOOK

FTC: This post contains affiliate links denoted with an asterisk(*). I make a small commission when you make a purchase with my links. I am honored to be financially supported in this way.

DATE NIGHT OUTFIT

This past Saturday, my husband and I went on a date. We visited one of our favorite spots in the Franklin area.

I had a completely different look in mind, but the weather had different plans, so I’ll have to save it for a warmer day. Check out which look I’m talking about in this video. Here’s what I ended up wearing:

Ozma Rae Cardigan in Black* | Size S

Ozma Kate Jean in Black*| Size: 25

Nisolo Open-Toe Paloma Mules* in black | Size 8.5

NY&Co Trench (no longer available; here’s something similar!)

Linjer Lana Bag in Maroon*

Mejuri Croissant Hoops

Mejuri Editor Hoops

Mejuri Bold Link Chain

Jewels and Aces Stripe Stud Earring (in my cartilage)

Check out this cute IG reel showing off my look! (ft. the dogs of course.)

Life Update (Closing Etsy Shop and Starting Patreon)

Dear Friends,

Things have changed a bit, and I want to get everyone up to speed on how Authentic by Frani is adjusting. There have only been a couple of shifts in the past few months, but they’ve been MAJOR, so here’s the backstory and my intentions for the future.

I’ve closed my Etsy shop!

If you’ve been with me since the beginning, you’d know I started Authentic by Frani back in 2015 as a way to share my spiritual growth through art and poetry. At the time, I thought an Etsy shop would be the best way to receive financial support for my hand-lettering and botanical illustrations. As the years went on, Etsy became something that gave me more exhaustion than excitement. Unfortunately, I was so obsessed with turning my shop into something profitable in order to prove my worth as an artist that I ended up feeling limited, uninspired, and ceased creating anything.

As a child, I was always encouraged to sell my cards and “make a cool mill", but that sweet, young version of me refused. She hated the idea, as there was something grimy about it for her. Back then, my cards were created because I loved to draw and give my art away, not to make massive profits. I guess I still feel this way.

When it came time for me to re-evaluate my work and what I’m choosing to give attention to, I came to the conclusion that it was time to let Etsy go. I’m grateful for the ways it supported me and allowed me to meet so many new people. My work has traveled all over the US and even into Canada and Europe. What an honor to get to say that!

What’s beautiful about closing the shop is now I spend more time drawing, and I’ve even started hand lettering the way I used to. The other day I had the urge to sit down and paint again! I haven’t felt excited about creating anything for a long time. Closing the shop gave me space and mental clarity, gifts I didn’t realize I needed.

That said, I still have a few sets of cards and prints remaining, and I would love to give them away. If you’re reading this, finish reading everything, but then send me an email through my contact form and I’d love to chat with you about getting some of my pieces in your hands. Just pay shipping.

I’ve started building a community on Patreon!

This might be perfect for you if you’re struggling to find your personal style because:

• you experience anxiety about your body and the topics surrounding it (how your body looks/doesn’t look, how clothes fit/don’t fit, what your clothes say about your inherent worth, etc.)

• you hop from trend to trend and have no idea what you like or what suits your frame

• you grew up in environments where your body was seen as evil or shameful

• you feel you need to prove your worth through over-functioning, over-working, and fitting the mold

(Believe it or not, all these issues are connected!)

What is Patreon?

Patreon is an online platform where you can support your favorite creators and gain exclusive access to their content, insights, and process. Creators, like myself, often offer multiple tiers at varying prices to encourage people to support them financially in the amount that feels responsible for them.

Why am I choosing to use this platform?

I want to create a gentle space to share the ways I’m growing and changing with the hope that it supports other people in their growth. I’m most passionate about exploring and discussing the overlap between trauma-informed mental health and personal style expression. I am by no means a professional, but I’m on a journey of unpacking my religious trauma (with professional help) and how that’s effected my relationship with my body and the earth. Personal style emerges from self-compassion, from building a gentle and kind relationship with yourself. It’s a lovely and tangible avenue to begin healing your relationship with your body and the earth.

I want to share what I’ve been learning because it’s been life-altering for me. I believe this perspective is valuable and liberating. I want to give people the opportunity to financially support my work if it resonates with them and they have the means.

What are my offerings?

My Patreon feed offers exclusive content revolving around astrological, seasonal, and lunar themes each month. Signing up at any tier gives access to a backlog of videos and posts that already exist on the feed.

TIER 1: Bare-Faced Beauties ($5/month) gain access to an exclusive feed where I share weekly videos and posts surrounding a monthly theme. The theme for March is RELEASE. At the end of each month, a graphic goes out to inform you what the next theme will be, as an encouragement to stick around!

**Patrons at all levels get to offer ideas about what topics they’d be interested in hearing me discuss or create videos around.

TIER 2: Outfit Repeaters ($10/month) have access to the same feed as the first tier. What makes this group special is their ability to shape and witness the Live New Moon Chats. Every New Moon, I share about the energy I’m feeling and the insights I’ve gathered each month. I then answer any questions you may have which shapes the conversation. When the moon is full, all is revealed. The new moon chats become accessible to lower tiers when the moon is full again.

**Special Offer for March: The Pisces New Moon chat on March 13th is available for all patrons this month! Sign up at any tier to join!

TIER 3: My Lovelies ($25/month) have access to me via personal messages on Patreon. Here, you can ask me whatever you’d like about personal style, body image, and mental health, and get specifically tailored advice for your journey. You also have access to the main feed and the live chats, of course.

TIER 4: Style Students ($100/month) is where I offer Body Typing Analysis and Style Consultations. I conduct an in-depth analysis and report about your Kibbe Body Type and how to honor your body’s inherent beauty, rather than correcting or hiding it. Our consultation will support you in your personal style journey by exploring which mental narratives prevent you from expressing yourself the way you want. At this tier, you also have access to the benefits of tiers 1-3.

How to access and support my work for FREE:

That’s all I wanted to share with you at this point. Interacting with me on social media the best way to get to know my personality and familiarize yourself with some of my methods and beliefs.

Subscribe to my YouTube channel and follow me on Instagram: @franimatthews

I am inviting you to join me as we grow together.

I am creating a world where it’s safe to heal and exist in your wholeness.

Looking forward to meeting you there.

Love, Frani

DOCUMENTING MY STYLE ON INSTAGRAM

2021 Gamine Winter Style Inspiration

(Just a heads up: This post contains affiliate links! I may earn a small commission if you choose to shop with my links. I’d be honored if you chose to support me and my blog that way.)

Winter is the opposite of Flamboyant Gamine style to me, as many functional/practical winter lines can overwhelm petite styles. The key is to play with color and textures to break the lines and keep a rather fitted silhouette. I cover some Flamboyant Gamine Style Foundations in this blog post.

As long as you keep your under layer fitted and the lines short and broken, you can probably get away with a longish line from a coat so long as it’s a 3/4 length, because FG is long-ish/not tall/not short. There are also ways to break the line in a ‘long’ coat using contrasting buttons and belts or patterns and color, or stitching and fabric layering.

FIND MORE INSPO THROUGHOUT THE SEASON. FOLLOW ME ON PINTEREST!

WINTER STYLE ICON: Audrey Hepburn | sleek, elegant, feminine, warm, charming

You’ll find photos of Audrey all over this blogpost because she’s the master of coats and turtlenecks, two necessities of Flamboyant Gamine winter fashion. I find her to remain all that she is, even while donning a larger, heavier coat.

What I want you to know is that you can still honor your lines in winter and stay warm, and here’s how I plan to do that.

TOPS

Turtlenecks (My favorite is the fitted turtleneck from Kotn)

Dad sweaters (Thrift them, swipe them from your own dad, grandpa, uncle, whoever has one)

Button-Up Cardigans (Fitted and cropped are going to be your favorite words this winter)

Crewneck Sweaters (like the one on Audrey down there. How cozy does that look? And they’re perfect for layering.)

BOTTOMS

Proper Trousers (I think trousers show up in ever seasonal style edit I write, because they’re SO flattering on the gamine frame, especially when they’re cropped and in the proper rise for your unique expression of flamboyant gamine.)

Skirts with Tights (This is something I want to try out. Mini skirts are a beautiful, cropped line, and tights are a way to show of your personality while still staying warm-ish.)

High-Waisted Denim with a Belt (The key here is the belt. I love those examples of the belt that matches the color of the pant, creating a sleek, monochrome look for the yang, but a chunky, shiny texture with the belt buckle and waist emphasis for the yin. I love the Kate Jean from OZMA.)

SHOES

Leather Boots (I have an ongoing partnership with Nisolo, so definitely check out them out for a beautiful, quality pair of ethically and sustainably made boots!)

Heels with socks/tights (Okay, this one feels risky to me. Probably because if this trend is done improperly, you can either look like a little girl or a streetwalker, neither of which are bad, just not quite the vibe. I’ll have to try this out in an upcoming YouTube video, so be sure to subscribe if you want to see how to pull this off.)

Oxfords/Loafers (Nisolo also has lovely options for oxfords and loafers for a timeless element for your outfits. I recently added the James Oxfords in Black to my wardrobe after pining over them for a couple years now, thanks to my partnership with the brand.)

ACCESSORIES + OUTERWEAR

Scarves (A no brainer. Raises the neckline adds literal warmth and texture, and if you’re going for three points, go for a scarf with a small, geometric pattern like a fine plaid.)

Chunky Jewelry (I wear gold jewelry, personally. GLDN is a brand I started working with recently after loving their pieces and brand philosophy for a year or so now. I recommend their pieces if you want to start your gold jewelry collection! Shop GLDN here. Use code FRANIMATTHEWS5 for $5 off your purchase.)

Long Wool Coats (Here’s where you can add a long, structured line to your outfit, especially as a Flamboyant Gamine, play with different patterns and really express parts of your personal style with fabric choices.)

Oversized Blazers (Similar to the wool coat, here’s another yang leaning element to add to a more fitted silhouette as a finishing piece, pulling the whole outfit together.)

HAIR:

Low bun (tuck away those ends to keep them strong and healthy come springtime)

Protective styles (like braids and twists)

Hair is an incredibly subjective and personal recommendation, and I know that full well as a half-black woman. I prefer to have my hair pulled back and out of the way to reduce manipulation of my curls and keep the hair moisturized and protected from the cold, dry winter, hence my recommendations above. I have a video on my youtube channel about this topic of Natural Hairstyles for the Body Types, if you’re in a hairstyle rut.

Thanks for taking this trip into my brain,

FRANI <3

A VIDEO VERSION OF THIS BLOG POST:

We love seasonal fashion videos! Here are the vibes I'm feeling for Winter 2021.Subscribe for more videos like this: https://bit.ly/36WPpybMORE #WINTERSTYLE ...

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Journaling Tips For Beginners (From Someone Who Keeps Record of Her Whole Life)

I’ve been journaling since I learned how to form coherent sentences. As a child, my favorite days involved going to Claire’s at the mall and picking out a new diary with a lock and key, even though I already had a few of them in a box under my bed. I’m an external processor and an introvert, so I needed an outlet that was also a secret place.

It was therapeutic for me to keep track of my interests and patterns because in order to cope growing up, it was better for me to forget myself and “become” the people around me. But in my journal, I was always myself, and I built fantasy lands for my brain to find safety and for my nervous system to return to equilibrium. I would always find myself there.

To this day, my journals are archives of my thought processes, emotional dumps, affirmations, lists, drawings, goals, and dreams. When times are difficult, I know I have a space to fill with unedited thought. Journaling is my escape.

photo by Leah PUttkAmmer of Gray Kammera (Go Follow Her! She’s an incredible human.)

Emotional Addiction + Journaling

This past year or so, I’ve begun a healing journey deep into my subconscious and childhood memory. I’ve uncovered parts of myself that I had ignored or rejected in those early developmental years. Unfortunately, the layers that once served as self-protection have decayed into self-sabotage now that I’m an adult.

In this process, I discovered a concept called ‘emotional addiction,’ where your nervous system craves certain emotions and chemical hits because it learned that was “safe” or that ever-present chaos and anxiety meant that someone loved you or cared about you. (Learn more by following @the.holistic.psychologist)

I found that the more I journaled about my panic (thinking I was working through my issues), the more panicked I became. The more I “processed” my fear of abandonment, the more hyper-focused I was on all the signs that I might not be emotionally safe.

My counselor told me to take a break from journaling for a week and see how I felt. I found that the way I was frantically documenting every event and every conversation was preventing that heavy energy from moving through my body. It created a feedback loop, intensifying the very emotions I was trying to release.

I needed to find a new way to journal, and get back to the ways I wrote as a kid, the ways that felt like safety and peace. While it’s certainly necessary and valuable for me to process my emotional energy and thought life, I’ve introduced a few different kinds of journaling into my practice as a reminder to notice all the energy around me, not just what’s going wrong.

MORE OF THIS

1. list of good

   This is similar to a gratitude list. It’s a punchy, short list where I reflect on all the beauty in my day, including the things that started off terribly and turned into something wonderful.

2. brain dump

   This is a task list ONLY, nothing emotional, just stuff that I need to do that’s taking space in my brain. It’s also not a to-do-right-now list, or something to act upon immediately, but a reference for when I’m feeling like I’m forgetting something. I have a new rule where if the task can be completed in 5-10 minutes, I do it straightaway, to prevent this list from piling up and becoming overwhelming.

3. “what I needed to hear"

   When my emotional needs aren’t met by the people around me, I’ll write out what I needed to hear in the moment, then read it out loud. This is a form of reparenting/inner child work that I learned in counseling, and it’s been a lifesaver for me. It helps release the pressure for my relationships to meet my every need, and I can give the moment more space to breathe.

4. what I want to learn/what I love/what I desire

   This is a fun one! I’m an Enneagram 9, which means one of my deepest fears is losing people I love or creating conflict because I’ve expressed my own preferences and desires. The type nine tends to forget themselves and “fall asleep” to what they want. They tend to hide in relationships and ‘merge’ to the preferences and desires of the more dominant personalities around them. When I make the “what I love” list, it’s a beautiful way for me to remember that I have things I enjoy, and it’s ok if other people don’t get it or misunderstand me. I have my own desires, and I belong to myself.

5. prompt writing/creative writing

   This is a method of writing I learned in a workshop with The Fold here in Nashville (Go follow them, @thefoldnashville!) Most of my poems and prose are written from single word, image, or quote prompts, thanks to their workshop. I feel more confident speaking my truth because of that safe and vulnerable space to write and share without judgement or criticism. It’s a lovely way to move some energy through and connect with your unseen patterns and the themes that run through your life.

LESS OF THAT

1. trauma obsessing

   As previously mentioned, I no longer want to intentionally relive painful moments of my life for the sake of “processing.” I’m allowed to take a break from the deep and heavy work. I’m meant to exist fully in the present moment, to learn from the past in order to reframe it or release it, not obsesses over it and bring that energy with me into the future.

2. negative moment "deciphering"

   In my journalling sessions, I would often overthink about the negativity in my life in order to figure out what went wrong and how to make sure I’d never experience that discomfort again. But what you focus on is what you begin to see everywhere, creating self-fulfilling prophecies that keep you stuck in old cycles. If I find my journaling session moving into this territory, I do my best to scan for any false messages about my identity and turn them into affirmations.

   For example, if I find a story about how I’ll never have what I want and I don’t feel like I’m being taken care of, I’ll write a truth to combat that thought when it shows up again, like: I am worthy of my desires. I am accepted and deeply loved. I am moving at my own pace.

These are just some practices that support me in this stage of my growth. I don’t do ALL of these methods in EVERY journalling session. They’re just tools in my pocket for when I want to journal, but don’t know where to begin. They give me some structure in order to prevent spiraling and over-thinking from being the only way I write.

To learn more about trauma-informed mental health, follow @minaa_b and @the.holistic.psychologist

To learn more about prompt-based first-draft writing, follow @thefoldnashville and attend a workshop if you’re a local!

Hope you enjoyed this trip into my brain.

Talk to you soon!

Frani <3

FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM

MORE OF MY THOUGHTS:

Building a Flamboyant Gamine Capsule Wardrobe

I’ve been studying David Kibbe’s Image ID system for a few years now. It’s helped me learn to love and accept my body and see beauty where there was once embarrassment and shame. Discovering that I was a Flamboyant Gamine gave me inspiration to experiment with my personal style and learn what lines and silhouettes were the most harmonious for my body. And you know what they say, learn the rules so you know how to break them.

From what I’ve read, Kibbe doesn’t advocate for capsule wardrobes, because he encourages women to consider the whole of the outfit when shopping for clothes, not just the individual pieces. I agree with that.

But the way I capsule wardrobe is different than the typical "I-have-10-basic-black-and-grey-and-white-garments”. (Nothing wrong with that, it’s just not for me.) The capsule wardrobe I’m building functions as a climate appropriate, year-round, versatile, self-expressive outfit capsule. I’m not completely there. I still have a few missing pieces/outfits, but I’m starting with what I have.

Moving slowly with this process has helped me see clearly what I need and what I don’t. In doing so, I realize that I gravitate toward a similar silhouette time and time again. Every time I rush into a purchase, I don’t seem to wear it as much as my tried and true mock-neck sweaters and high waisted trousers.

Since I know my shape is based on the Flamboyant Gamine archetype presented by Kibbe’s Image ID system, I have guidelines to follow when considering how I want to dress. While I don’t follow his recommendations religiously, I still value his perspective and insight. Here are five of his recommendations I take to heart:

1. Wear separates

   The purpose of wearing separates as a gamine is to mimic and honor the lines in your body that are mixed and broken up. Gamines have a mixture of Yin (soft, small, round, delicate) and Yang (sharp, large, long, strong) extremes within their own frame, and these lines are described as staccato or juxtaposed (or as I like to call it, frankensteined). Wearing separates, as opposed to long, monochrome lines, is a simple, no-brainer way to dress for gamines. I’ve definitely experienced the ease of following this recommendation, so I keep it in my back pocket.

2. Wear short, angular garments

   Gamines are typically short— no taller than 5’5” (165cm). There are certainly some exceptions to this rule, but we won’t get into it here. The gamine bone structure begs for cropped lines, so I tend to create short, boxy silhouettes whenever I can. This can show up as a cropping a tee, tucking and blousing a shirt, cutting or rolling the hem of my pants to expose ankles, or rolling my sleeves to expose my wrists.

3. Wear Fitted (not skin-tight) silhouettes

   The yin of the gamine is found in their frame and stature as well as their faces. My bones are small, narrow, and sharp. I have a mixture of tiny, short bones (in my face and torso) and tiny, long bones (in my arms and legs). To honor these bodily patterns, I wear closely fitted garments as a base layer, making dressing my body more seamless. I tend to avoid skin tight garments, primarily because of the yang undercurrent of my body. Skin-tight clothing ironically feels separate from me because I lose the angularity my long limbs and sharp shoulders crave.

4. Wear animated patterns and chunky textures

   Small, interesting patterns tend to pull the bold, youthful energy of the gamine to the surface. I’ve noticed I’m naturally drawn to small, dainty patterns, especially if they’re geometric or floral. One of my favorite jumpsuits is bright red with a delicate, irregular, floral pattern on it. Whenever I wear it I feel very much like myself, and that’s always the goal. Chunky textures can also create a plethora of small geometric shapes, so when I don’t want to wear a more attention grabbing piece, a chunky knit or textured garment honors my lines in a subtle, chic way.

5. Add sleek and modern lines to honor a yang undercurrent

   This step is more of a finishing touch in my mind— adding a blazer, painting on a crisp, red lip, throwing on a small, angular bag, or adorning yourself with pair of shiny, gold statement earrings. These finishing touches are a great way to express your personal style as well.

MY [IDEAL] FLAMBOYANT GAMINE WARDROBE

1. Striped Shirt

2. Camisole

3. Mock-neck Sweater

4. Fitted Turtleneck

5. Band Tee

6. A Short Dress

7. A Jumpsuit

8. Oversized, Quirky Sweater (think 90’s Dad)

9. Cropped Cardigan

10. Trousers

11. Cropped, Straight-leg Denim

12. Blazer

13. Combat Boots

14. Chelsea boots

15. Sneakers

16. Trench Coat

17. Wool Coat

I don’t have all of these pieces, but I have most of them! Depending on your personal style, these pieces can be mixed and matched into numerous outfits for many occasions, and with a bit of layering, can be worn year round in milder climates like the American Southeast. I have many YouTube videos where I style the pieces I own, so definitely check that out (and subscribe!) if you want to see my thought-process when creating outfits.

It's autumn in the northern hemisphere, which means it's time to break out your favorite pair of boots. In this video, I show you the many ways I like to wea...

Colors are also quite important in this process. I know I look best in warmer and muted colors, and my hope is to reduce the amount of black clothing in my wardrobe for colors that melt into my skin and give it a milky, radiant glow. As always, I’ll share more as I learn more.

Hope you enjoyed this little trip into my brain.

Talk to you soon,

Frani <3

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Follow along on Instagram for outfit inspiration, life updates, and more!

RECENT THOUGHTS:

2020 Gamine Fall Style Inspiration

Early fall weather is my favorite: cool mornings and evenings, but still summer during the day. I experience seasonal depression, so once the cold, dry winter weather hits, the quality of my mood disintegrates. Late fall/almost winter is NOT my jam. I need those warm afternoons for my sanity, okay? But when the weather changes, I adapt with my clothes with warm textures and layers and lots of hot tea.

I’ll be updating my Fall Inspo Board on Pinterest all season, so definitely follow me there to see where my head’s at.

TOPS:

High neck sweaters (I’m realizing I prefer a mock neck over a turtleneck.)

Big shirts/graphic tees (Thrift them, or steal them from your dad)

Oxford button down (I love this one from KOTN)

BOTTOMS:

Straight-leg denim (I like these from Sezane)

Wide leg denim (I just purchased a pair! These ones from Madewell are basically the same cut, just a different wash)

Trousers (These are my dream pair from kotn )

Bike shorts

OUTERWEAR:

Trench coat

Wool coat

Blazer

SHOES:

Black Leather Mules (Like the Nisolo Open-toe Paloma Mules)

Sneakers (The more dad-like the better!)

Black Chelsea Boots (like the new Nisolo Carmen Chelsea Boots )

HAIR AND MAKEUP:

Protective styles + beanies

Sleek hairstyles + large earrings

Terracotta lips and eyes

Monochrome makeup looks

MORE IDEAS ON YOUTUBE:

Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

FOLLOW ALONG ON INSTAGRAM:

My Nisolo Wishlist + End of Season Sale!

(Disclaimer: I’m an affiliate with Nisolo, so naturally this post contains affiliate links. I’d be honored if you chose to support me by shopping with my links.)

Nisolo is a brand I’ve loved for a while now. Ever since I set eyes upon their kiosk at the Mall at Green Hills back in 2017, I’ve been a huge fan of their beautiful, ethically crafted leather pieces and brass jewelry. Whenever I need a new pair of shoes, their website is the first place I look.

For the first time ever, their Warehouse Sale is going digital. Since you all hang out in my corner of the internet, you get early access to samples, factory seconds, discontinued designs, and summer bestsellers marked down to make room for a new season.

In case you need some inspiration, I made a list of what have my eye on. There are some pieces that have been marked down, but if the item you fall in love with isn’t already up to 50% off, you can use the code NEWSEASON for 15% off all items (excluding masks and cleaning supplies).

MY NISOLO WISHLIST

SOFT DIAMOND HOOP EARRINGS | $35

I was looking for an angular hoop, and when I saw these, I put them on my list immediately.

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Amalia All Weather Boot in brown | $250

These boots would be perfect for soggy and mild Nashville winters. I love an androgynous boot, and the ones I currently own are on their last leg.

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Mariella mule in sand | $170

This is a pair that I LOVE, but my doggy chomped them up. Trust me, I never leave my shoes on the floor anymore.

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isla slide sandal in black | $90

The Isla slides were the first pair of shoes I purchased from Nisolo, but my doggy chewed these up too!

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PIECES I ALREADY OWN (AND LOVE!)

LORI TOTE IN SAND | $170

Here’s a picture of the shoe-chomping culprit with the tote bag that I bring with me everywhere— airports, coffee shops, and other mundane places that you ought to wear a mask. Nisolo has a fine selection of masks as well, if you don’t have one already.

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OPEN-TOE PALOMA MULES IN BLACK | $160

At the bottom of this post, I have a video where I style the Palomas! they’re so elegant. I feel instantly refined whenever I wear them.

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LUISA CLUTCH IN NUTMEG | $50 (LAST CALL in this material for $40)

I brought this clutch with me on my anniversary dinner, and it’s just the right size for the essentials— phone, lipstick, wallet.

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BRASS HAMMERED RINGS | $25 (on sale for $21)

I never take these rings off. If you ever see a photo of my right hand, which is very rare, I wear a size 6 on my thumb and a size 5 on my ring finger.)

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That’s everything, my friends. I hope you feel inspired to add some high quality, ethically and sustainably made shoes and accessories to your wardrobe. Pieces like these have elevated my everyday looks, and I’m excited to grow my Nisolo collection.

STYLING MY PALOMA MULES:

Some old combos elevated with high-quality footwear and a shirt that I rediscovered after trying on allllll my clothes a few weeks ago. Nisolo Affiliate Link...

MORE FASHION ON INSTAGRAM:

May 2020: Poetry Reading + Graphics

I keep preparing for rain

and it never shows up.

I feel two drops

and I rush inside,

rush back from the walk,

cover the wolf-spider

living in the jar.

But then,

the sun came back out,

and the clouds turned

orange and fuchsia that night.

I could’ve gone outside

for a better view, but

I wanted everything

to go my way,

so I missed it.

Let my dog out in the dusk,

and she turned blue.

I could’ve been blue too.

(20200408)

This poem carries many meanings for me.

Unfulfilled desire. An attempt to control everything and be prepared, only to have circumstances change rapidly. Feeling disconnected from the moment. That low hum of irritability, that tends to build up and burst on undeserving passers-by.

In therapy, I’m learning how to allow my emotions to exist without judging them as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. I’ve had to learn to allow myself to be sad, to be angry, to be fearful, to be jealous, then to listen to the messages they have to give me.

Sadness taught me that I have expectations and preferences. She gives me perspective and encourages me to slow down and release. She allows me to grieve and let the heaviness go.

Anger taught me to notice where I’m being taken advantage of or overlooked. She gives me the fire to speak up and show up for myself. She gives me the strength to create boundaries and honor my time.

Fear taught me that my life is valuable. She keeps me awake, alert. She reminds me that I’m capable of creating the life I want, that I’m seen and accepted as I am.

Jealousy taught me that I finally have clear desires and goals. On those days when it’s difficult to watch others enjoy aspects of life that I crave, she reminds me to check in with my pace. To remember that everything meant for me will come my way. To take this time to prepare the soil and nurture the seedlings.

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SAVE THIS PHOTO FOR A FREE LOCKSCREEN:

(It’s also available on my INSTAGRAM story highlights to screenshot under ‘POETRY’.)

WATCH THE POETRY READING HERE OR ON IGTV:

ORIGINAL POETRY AND MORE ON THE ‘GRAM:

2020 Gamine Summer Style Inspiration

Here’s the thing about summer of 2020: I feel like there’s a leaning toward very frilly, girly, flowery dresses and blouses starting to emerge on my feed. I’ve found that these sorts of lines rarely look good on me because they’re too soft and not structured enough for my yang-leaning figure.

All images in this grid from pinterest.

Now, I don’t see this as a problem or a disappointment, as there is a season for everything in life and fashion. But I’m going to choose to be the walking juxtaposition I am and wear whatever makes me feel beautiful, feminine, powerful, etc., which usually means wearing more structured, masculine lines. (I even made a Pinterest board about it. I update the board when the inspiration hits, so definitely follow me over there!)

All that said, here’s what I’m drawn to for the summer of 2020:

GENERAL VIBE: playing with short vs. long opposites, cropped, boxy styles, open backs, care-free, cropped linen, going bra-less, tailored short-suits, golden/bronzy makeup & skin

Some of these pieces pictured/mentioned are the actual item I’m hoping to pick up, some are just a vibe I’ll be thrifting around for. Actual items I’m hoping to purchase are linked! Affiliate links are denoted with an asterisk (*).

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TOPS:

Breton Striped, boat neck long sleeve top. (cropped)

Square neck crop top

HUGE shirt that I steal from my Dad (or maybe thrift for)

Chunky, beige cropped cardigan w/ contrasting buttions (not sure if I want an oversized cropped one, or something more fitted)

All images in this grid from pinterest.

BOTTOMS:

Cut off shorts (high waist)

Black denim mini skirt (like this one from Everlane)

linen "trouser” shorts (Like these from Frank and Oak)

DRESSES:

Backless, linen, mini dress or romper

Ribbed, bodycon dress (I love how Zoe and Lisa look in theirs, so I want to give it a try.)

All images in this grid from pinterest.

SHOES/ACCESSORIES:

Heeled Sandals (Like the Nisolo Paloma Mules in Black*)

Flat Sandals (Like the Isla Slides in Black*)

Hoop earrings (I’m looking to get my cartilage pierced this summer, and I want to get a little bb hoop for that.)

Red Swimsuit (I LOVE this one from Hackwith Design House. I’ve had my eye on it for a couple summers now.)

Image 1, 3, and 4 from pinterest. Image 2 from Hackwithdesignhouse.com.

MAKEUP/HAIR

sultry, grungy eyes

freckles (natural)

‘bare’ skin/ BB creams

messy brows

bronze goddess

braids and twists

care-free curly afro

HERE’S A VIDEO WHERE I SPEAK IN DEPTH ABOUT THIS LIST:

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Can you have long hair if you're short?

Yes. Obviously the answer is yes.

You can do anything you want. But, the real question is: can a person 5’5’’ (165cm) or shorter look good with hair down to their hips? I’m testing it out in this video so you can understand visually what makes this certain hairstyle look flattering.

If you’ve followed me for any amount of time, you’d know I’m currently studying the David Kibbe Image ID system. This method of perception in fashion is the most fascinating to me because it views women as a whole beings, not just shapes, or fruits, or measurements.

It takes into account the balance of yin (rounded, soft, lush, small, short, wide, ‘feminine’) and yang (long, narrow, lithe, sharp, ‘masculine’) within a single woman’s frame, and accentuates those lines. Rather than traditional systems that try to correct “less desirable” bodies to make everyone fit into the same box, Kibbe’s system celebrates the unique body- the individual essence, shape, and coloring- focusing on self-love and self-acceptance.

Within Kibbe’s system, I most connect with the Flamboyant Gamine. She’s described as Gamine (a combination of opposite yin/yang extremes) with Dramatic (yang) undercurrents. So she tends to look small, angular, narrow, compact, boyish, and youthful, with a larger than life spirit. She can use yang lines in “smaller doses” but it shouldn’t dominate the entirety of her look. Broken, sharp and body skimming lines suit her best. (This is just a brief description, a compilation of things I’ve learned from dressing my own body and finding what look the best.)

(All above images from Pinterest)

With this in mind, let’s consider the original question: Can a shorter woman have long hair and still look good?

I’m a 5’5” (165cm) Flamboyant Gamine. I feel long hair (especially if it’s straight) can be a cool, flattering element that adds yang to an overall look. So as long as your outfit, shoes, accessories, etc. are cropped, angular, and vibrant, having long hair can be the cherry on top for your head to toe look.

When I wear my hair in box braids, I choose to keep in mind that I now have a VERY vertical, long yang element on my rather petite frame. On the days where I’m getting dressed (which honestly hasn’t been with much intention due to the state of society at the moment), I consider keeping my outfits fitted, cropped, and structured.

In general, I’d say to consider if you have long lines in your frame. (For example, my face shape and nose are prominent and vertical, so are my arms, legs, hands and feet.) Long hair can repeat those lines, and ultimately be in harmony with your bones, helping create a unique, eccentric look when combined with shorter, cropped elements. Try it out and see!

If you feel like a certain hairstyle connects with you and makes you feel beautiful, then go for it!

Experiment. Have fun. Find what make you feel like YOU.

HOW TO GET THE LOOK:

In this video about having long hair as a flamboyant gamine, I discuss how to wear your hair long as a shorter woman featuring some outfit ideas to create an...

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April 2020: Poetry Reading + Graphics

I am made of air and space.

It’s no wonder I tend to deflate in this shell.

I spin and shrivel when I ignore my frame.

(20190329)

I wrote this poem during a season of redefining self care, around this time last year.

I was reflecting in a journal entry from the same day, “Self-care is intentional and vital. You do not stumble into self-care; it is a practice and a discipline. Accidental self-care is avoidance. Give yourself space to experience all the things you encourage and advise others to do.

I can’t accidentally clean my house or journal, or do yoga and feel connected to my body. I forget the inherent reward those actions bring; the focus, clarity of mind, the breath, the space.”

Then that poem emerged, something about my true nature, my elemental state, and what happens when I neglect to take care of her. I didn’t write for days after that.

Reading my own words a year later, I find them to be a bit harsh, a bit blunt like the stern parent who needs to be clear about what’s important. I tend to speak to myself more gently these days, but I suppose I needed to be honest with myself because of how numb I was becoming, locked in my routines and habits.

But the poem that this discipline birthed still resonates with me.

This poem is featured on the April page of my 2020 Homeostasis Calendar. (There are three of them left, If you need some brightness and light-reflection in your year.)

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Save this photo for a free lockscreen!

(It’s also available on my INSTAGRAM story highlights to screenshot under ‘POETRY’.)

WATCH THE POETRY READING HERE OR ON IGTV:

QUESTIONS FROM THE VIDEO:

What are you made of? What creates your sense of self?

How do you pay attention to what you're made of? How do you notice yourself?

What do you experience when you're not paying attention to yourself?

2020 Spring Style Inspiration

This is the energy I’m predicting for the spring of 2020: mixtures of opposites and alternating lines. (Basically, the essence of a Kibbe Flamboyant Gamine.)

Hope you find some inspiration here, (follow on PINTEREST for more), and enjoy a look into what I’m finding to be lovely this season.

FASHION: beige, sheer, grey, and red.

Fashion-wise, I love the idea of wearing pieces that are beige and neutral, but throwing in a strong, tomato red element in the mix. As the weather warms up, I’ll be looking for feminine, sheer pieces to juxtapose with tailored menswear. Legs will be making an appearance more often as well, playing with narrow, cropped lines as a base, and long angular pieces on top.

For shoes, I’m interested in a heavy black boot or a leather loafer, depending on the mood.

MAKEUP: almost naked eye + red lips VS. graphic eyes (like Twiggy)

Makeup-wise, I’m inspired by the 60’s. Think Twiggy. Think Edie Sedgwick. I’m planning on wearing dark, heavy liner, and accentuating my eyes in the spring.

On the other hand, I’ll be going for an almost naked eye, and to continue with the theme, a bright red lip would look stunning. Minimal, glowing skin will pull it all together.

I’ve recently discovered that I LOVE how I look with my hair slicked down. I tried it and immediately felt so beautiful and refined, like my head wasn’t as big as I thought. I think this hairstyle balances the extreme makeup looks and creates more contrast, giving attention to my face.

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Will you be trying out any of these ideas for spring? I’m excited about it. Definitely follow me on Instagram to keep up with my fashion diary. I post my favorite looks over there, as well as recent poetry and musings.

Morning Routine for February

A morning routine begins the night before— A full stomach, a warm bed, a clean face and body, a book, a drawing, deep breaths. [This is the fastest way for me to fall asleep.]

My ears wake before my eyes. I ask my body what she needs. [Sometimes she needs to linger in bed, sometimes she needs to wake up and pee.]

I drink water. I pet the dog. [It’s an attempt to stay off my phone right when I wake up, but I have compassion if my lizard brain goes straight for the phone.]

I start slowly, journaling, sipping coffee. Yoga is a must, as I thank my body for carrying me through the night. I thank my breath for always returning. [Mornings are my favorite time of day; there's something beautiful about each day being brand new.]

I’ve begun speaking out loud “Today is a good day. I have love to give. I have a place to live. I have so many opportunities. Anything can happen.” Call it a prayer; call it a mantra. [This keeps me in an open posture, whether I’ve woken up early or late, whether I’ve spent “too long” scrolling on my phone. Again, it’s an act of self-compassion.]

My default breakfast is soft scrambled eggs on buttered toast with Earl Grey or Chai tea on the side. I could eat this every day, so almost always do. [Some mornings, I don’t eat breakfast at all because I don’t feel hungry. I just wait until lunch to consume leftovers from the night before.]

This is the best part of the morning: getting dressed and doing my makeup and hair. [I anticipate this moment of self-expression and bringing my internal mood, external. I have so many options as a Flamboyant Gamine for communicating my heart through style.]

I post on IG, then walk the dog to get away from obsessively checking my phone. Then, get to work on what I have planned. I do my best to avoid overwhelm when it comes to my work. I give myself three major tasks to complete, anything else that gets done is a bonus. [I’m an Enneagram 9, so I need simple methods like this to prioritize, avoiding non-essential tasks and procrastination.]

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And that’s it! These are the major components of a mindful morning practice for me. The order may change or time spent in each “activity” may fluctuate, but this is what the morning usually looks like for me. Check out the video below to see an actual morning of mine and more in depth perspective of why these practices are important to me.

I work from home and have some flexibility in when I start on projects and videos. If you have a 9-5 kind of life, maybe consider incorporating aspects of this routine into your morning, or consider how to make your weekends or days-off more intentional.

Best to each of you, and much love,

FRANI

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